Posts Tagged: Banana Stupid


27
Oct 08

I Declare War on the Banana Diet!

icecreamsandwich.jpg

Homemade banana ice cream sammiches, Image from chubbyhubby.net

We don’t have to sit by while the “Morning Banana Diet” marches across the planet, raising prices for the fruit and making emaciated zombies of us all. Here’s a brand new recipe – from the Chubby Hubby Blog – for homemade banana ice cream, served between brownie cookies – that I hope will be the beginning of a massive counter-strike against the craze that begin a few months ago in Japan.

Banana tip: freeze them when they go brown. They keep for months, and you can use them to make all kinds of delicious stuff. Next in the arsenal: this banana pudding recipe – made with vanilla wafers – from the chitterlings.com soul food site (the recipe is almost at the bottom of the page.) We’re going to make some this week. Report, with pictures, to come.

Thanks to my Dad for suggesting the recipe.


25
Oct 08

Insane Banana Diets Can Also Raise Prices – Which Proves Something

Lots of folks emailed me news items on this. Japan has gone nuts for the “Morning Banana Diet,” which promises to help you lose weight with this formula: you start in the morning with a breakfast of bananas and room-temperature water, then eat whatever you want – other than desert – the rest of the day. You can’t eat later than six in the evening. you don’t need to exercise, and people are going nuts. A half-dozen books on the diet have become best sellers, and the price of the fruit has shot up to over $3.00 per pound (more than quadruple what we pay in the U.S., and well over triple the average price in a Tokyo supermarket.)

The backstory? An opera singer told a talk show she’d lost over 30 pounds on the banana diet. The craze began from there.

bananas_japan_1014.jpg

Happy dieter, from a Reuters pic that accompanied a Time magazine story on the diet.

A spokesperson for Dole – the nation’s largest banana importer (second largest in the world) – told Great Britain’s Daily Mail that this was “the first time bananas have been so scarce. Right now, we are finding ourselves unable to meet demand.”

There was an earlier banana diet craze, in 1995, that began with the U.S. release of a book called “The Amazingly Simple Banana Diet,” by Clifford Thurlow (who also wrote a biography of Salvador Dali.) I couldn’t find any details on the actual program, sadly, or whether Japan’s morning banana regime was similar to it.

Does the diet work? Sure. If you eat fewer calories than you take in, then you’ll lose weight. If you skip your normal breakfast, and substitute a banana; and cut out alcohol and desserts – both of which might reasonably be assumed to be part of the diet of a person who might want to drop a few kilos, you’ll accomplish that goal. The books claim that the diet achieves weight loss through a lot of metabolic bunkum, which would be nice. In the 1920s, American banana companies hired armies of doctors to promote all kinds of health claims about the fruit, but even then, they pretty much stuck to the truth.

And even at three bucks a pound, you’ll still save money, after you weigh the price of what you’ve foregone, versus the single banana you’ve slotted in per day.

To get a little serious: as I’ve said in the past, the price of bananas is key to the fruit’s success – they are the cheap fruit. Things like disease and weather threaten to raise costs to point at which the fruit returns to its “genuine” state – an expensive, tropical rarity. I’ve advocated, as a solution to any future banana crisis, that importers look into providing a portfolio of banana varieties – as those same companies do with apples and citrus – that would diversify the crop and offer the fruit along a spectrum of tastes and prices. In its own ridiculous way, the Japan craze has proven that consumers will pay more for bananas if they that the fruit offers something more than just a partnership with corn flakes.


14
Sep 08

The Banana Splits: A Freaktastic Television Show Returns

42026929.jpg

Photo: PR Newswire

Readers from other countries, you’ll just have to take my word for it: “The Banana Splits” was one of the strangest things ever presented to children as entertainment. It was an NBC show with costumes created by Sid and Marty Kroft, who might best be described as Walt Disney, split into two by genetic mutation, dropped into a vat of ergot, and unleashed onto the world with at least temporary carte blanche to produce television for adolescents and potheads. Since I was the former, and the grownups in my house were the latter, I have warm memories of Saturday morning gatherings to watch this program.

Four costumed creatures made up “The Banana Splits” (the name came from the rock band they formed; their jingle – also known as the ‘Tra La La’ song – was so genuinely catchy that it was appropriated as the hook for Bob Marley’s “Buffalo Soldiers.”) The quartet are Fleegle the Dog, Drooper the Lion, Bingo the Gorilla, and Snorky the Elephant. They live in a Banana Pad and drive in their Banana Buggy, which is more than most people in the banana world can say.

In a press release, Warner Bros. executive Jordan Sollitto, promised that the new version of the program would stay true to the original: “Everything that made The Banana Splits hugely popular in the ’60s is back,” he said. I believe this, especially since medical marijuana can be purchased by just about anybody who’s willing to say they have a hangnail in California, where the show is produced. Definitely replenish your stash prior to visiting the show’s website, whose accompanying soundtrack and multimedia you will find either completely hypnotic or very, very upsetting – just as the original show was.

Also, you can join a club and get an awesome membership card:

bananasplitclub.jpg

Read the hilariously titled press release: “Warner Bros. Serves Up Four Scoops of Hilarity With Relaunch.”

UPDATE: The BBC sort of debunks the Bob Marley/Banana Splits song similarity. Audio from both is included, so listen for yourself and decide.


27
Jun 08

Heroic Clerk Saves Store from Banana Attack

apu_nahasapeemapetilon.png

Battles Banana-Wielding Thug.

In my book, I note that one observer described the banana as a “weapon of conquest” in Latin America. This doesn’t apply in Maryland, where a would-be thief attempted to use the fruit to rob a 7-Eleven – and was denied by a brave clerk.

Incredibly (or maybe not so incredibly), this isn’t the first time this has happened – and the last time, the guy got eighteen months in the hoosegow for his malfeasance (third item down.)


25
Jun 08

Co-opt. Subvert. Destroy.

A bigger threat to the banana than any disease. The world’s favorite fruit is the cheapest and healthiest alternative to junk food. So what would the junk food industry do?

This:

banana_pie.jpg

Gotta go try one.


14
Apr 08

Baboon Prefers Bananas over Kittehs. Thank Goodness.

monkey-and-cat-2.jpg

Though one’s gotta say, kitteh don’t look too happeh.